Monday, June 01, 2009

Urine, Nipples and Bunny Hops

The best and worst part of racing is the tension at the starting line. Athletes are breathing heavy, stretching awkwardly in close quarters and participating in strange pre-race rituals. The start line tension is heightened in Triathlons because you are standing waist deep in cold water. At the Sea Horse Challenge I needed a release, a familiar face or a funny joke to calm my nerves before tempting fate on another 500 yard swim. I made the decision to ask about pissing in a wet suit. I was surprised at how many responded with "It is great" or "I just did." The power of persuasion drove me to test it, warming my body and propelling me to a new swim PR, cutting 20 urine soaked seconds off of the Fort Custer XTERRA.

The biggest obstacle on the bike leg was a speed bump shortly after the transition. Forums and promoters warned about the dangers and when I walked by I said to my wife: I am just going to bunny hop that bitch. 5 Minutes later the promoter warned: "Every year racers try hopping the bump and someone crashes, so slow down and roll over it." One sideways glance from my wife (similar to those when I make an unauthorized bike gear purchase or forget to put my bike shorts away) and I was warned.

I did not listen when I pulled up going 30 MPH, clearing the bump but bouncing my only water bottle leaving me parched on the 10 mile ride. I pushed a tall gear to the 5th fastest bike split on the day and paid for my bunny hopping shenangigans on the run.

With dry throat and valuable lessons learned (listen to Holly always) I burned through the 5K in a bad way, getting passed by several runners.

I ended the day 35th overall and 5th in my age group. A solid effort and exciting mix of pricey bikes, bare chests, short shorts, wierd athletes and fun times.

A very special thanks to my wife's home cooking and the in laws for cheering me on.

Stay Tuned for several June Race Reports.

Digging Dog Proof Garden:

Danny "The Rocket"
Pete Post:
Digging Dogs:


Bill G said...

I dig the pic of pistol pete. That guy is a champion!

CBD said...

For extra cool points, pee in the wetsuit before you get in the water. The trail you leave is a great icebreaker.